Thursday, January 28, 2010

One more step away from Mom

Until last night Wyatt has been sleeping in his bassinet beside our bed. Unfortunately, he has run out of room. LOL, he is too long and the bassinet is not very wide, so he bangs around the sides all night trying to get comfy (I also read that at his age babies are known to practice rolling while they sleep). So yesterday evening, I decided it was time to detach myself a little more from my baby and let him sleep in his crib, in his own room. Of course Wyatt didn't know the difference and slept well. I, on the other hand, was awake for a good part of the night convincing myself he would be ok. At one point I was sure he would roll over and fall out of the crib (dumb because the crib has sides). I literally had to make myself stay in bed. Otherwise I would have been at his door every five minutes. Thankfully we both made it through the night just fine and the bassinet is being packed up today never again to be used by baby Wyatt.
Last night Wyatt also put himself to sleep, and before Caleb and I went to bed I checked on him. No pacifier, instead he found his fingers (index and middle) and was sucking away. I was tempted to take a picture, but I didnt want to wake him. I figured we will see those fingers in his mouth more often then we would like in the near future.

Ok. Seriously reading what I am writing is breaking my heart. My baby is getting bigger and while that is a good thing (health wise) I just dont know what to do. I look at him everyday and think he is not just a little baby, he is one day thing to be a little boy and then a man. Sometimes I hold him a little longer then I planned just because I know that one day he will be a teenager and we will have intense conversations that he will not like. And sometimes he may not like me too much ( I'm a realist) because he is not getting his way, So it is against those types of days that I cuddle my little baby a while longer, just because I can.

Does any of this make sense? I feel like I am being way overly sentimental and babbling. Oh well.

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